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Are you making the right choice?

Cuti seminggu dah habis.Xda apa kot yang terlalu menarik nak dikongsikan di sini.Nama ja bawa kamera ke majlis kahwin sepupu..tapi satu gambar pengantin pun tak ambil.Heran aku.Dah balik keningau ni.Sekali balik, kedepuk kerja berlambak.Hari tu sombong, tak mau bawa balik kerja balik kampung.Ya lah, nama pun cuti.Night before balik kampung pulak gedik nak ber'funfair' sampai lupa diri.huhuuuuuuu.

Aku banyak menonton tv sepanjang cuti.Minda aku cepat menangkap skrip yang menarik dan bijak yang mana boleh menggerakkan fikiran.Antaranya..

Brian: I was engaged with Julie. My family n friends expect that we will get marry and it didn't happened. I'm so sad.

Nora: No Brian..you cannot live the way people think you suppose to...but it is you to choose.

Taken from " The Edge of Garden"

and this got me thinking....life is about choosing even though sometimes we feel like we have been left with no choice. Am i making the right choice? to choose means that to determine, to have a deep thought, to think about the consequences not just for me but for others because i cant live alone. Sometimes, we have to get through till the end to know the result..whether is it a smart move to select this other than that because prediction always prediction and what is for sure happens only God know. It also happens where at first we feel like we made wrong choice/decision but later it turn up to be "If my cousin didnt force me to join the so called boring-environmental-event the other day, i wouldnt meet sophia,my soulmate" that kinda situation. Ya......somehow, wrong choice can be the best choice u ever mad! I have chosen not to bring my workload at home and NOW is time to repay the time i had at home...but it still worth it.I don't mind working hard now just to make me look smarter busy..haha....

So this time i've made the right choice... =) obviously im trying to be optimistic at the moment~


Pour it out

There alots of things i wanna write here actually..but all just become sound of thoughts in my head and slowly fading away...i dont have the passion to write anymore maybe because i dont have any responses..and no one ever bothered to comment my entry.That's ok...to be honest as we getting older and older...the commitment and dedication has shift to other direction..2 or 3 years back I can only think about myself and doing my own things at my own place...but now i still consider myself in everything I do but now I got to take my family and his family into consideration. Life never easy and test keep coming in many different ways no matter how small and big they are..beside they will make u stronger they can also can break u till no strength left..

I have my own dream..in future I want a happy family Lovely Husband and Beautiful Kids stay in our own home drive our own car maybe we have this financial matter here and there but we keep up..but we will be living in HAPPY SUPER NO PROBLEM AT ALL family...well..thats the problem with me..i got this dream that is tooooooooooo sweet and fly to high will only break me into pieces if i fall...I have very bad expectation in future...im afraid of future actually...WHY do i have to be far away from him?? WHY i feel so insecure?? WHAT it will be in future?? CAN i still pursue master?? WILL i have the passion to write again?? WILL i be ready to leave sabah for him??WILL the same thing happen to aunt, where she just leave in KL but never back home for lime 10years, happen to me??WILL i be a good wife??WILL i be a better muslim after marriage??everything resound in my head.....
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