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3.3.12

Pour it out

There alots of things i wanna write here actually..but all just become sound of thoughts in my head and slowly fading away...i dont have the passion to write anymore maybe because i dont have any responses..and no one ever bothered to comment my entry.That's ok...to be honest as we getting older and older...the commitment and dedication has shift to other direction..2 or 3 years back I can only think about myself and doing my own things at my own place...but now i still consider myself in everything I do but now I got to take my family and his family into consideration. Life never easy and test keep coming in many different ways no matter how small and big they are..beside they will make u stronger they can also can break u till no strength left..

I have my own dream..in future I want a happy family Lovely Husband and Beautiful Kids stay in our own home drive our own car maybe we have this financial matter here and there but we keep up..but we will be living in HAPPY SUPER NO PROBLEM AT ALL family...well..thats the problem with me..i got this dream that is tooooooooooo sweet and fly to high will only break me into pieces if i fall...I have very bad expectation in future...im afraid of future actually...WHY do i have to be far away from him?? WHY i feel so insecure?? WHAT it will be in future?? CAN i still pursue master?? WILL i have the passion to write again?? WILL i be ready to leave sabah for him??WILL the same thing happen to aunt, where she just leave in KL but never back home for lime 10years, happen to me??WILL i be a good wife??WILL i be a better muslim after marriage??everything resound in my head.....

2 komen masuk:

Aida Omar berkata...

be strong dear.. hope apa yang kamu impi kan itu menjadi satu kenyataan kelak.. :)

syamsid dhuha berkata...

if you think like that maybe not possible to achieve something , but if your have "passions" and make "ibadah" with a good sound of "doa" insya-allah that will help you :) . allah always hear what we said .

 
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